SURPRISE! Baby bean #2 May 2016.

It has been a whirlwind of the past two months. Absolute whirlwind is the only way to explain it.

The Thursday before labor day I was doing my work out and I got dizzy and puked. Which was unusual for me. My cycle had been whack ever since we quit breastfeeding so I decided to take a pregnancy test expecting the result I got a big negative. Which later I would realize it was in fact a positive, hello super faint line. We headed to Hickory for the Labor Day weekend and I didn't think anymore of it. If it had been lining up with my last cycle I was due to start on Labor Day. I decided to go ahead and call the doctor Tuesday morning just to see if this was normal. The nurse encouraged me to take another pregnancy test although we both expected a negative. C and I ran out and got two boxes of pregnancy tests and I called Derik while I peed on the stick holy positive pregnancy test. I'm not going to lie I began to hyperventilate we had talked about starting to try again maybe this time next year when C turned two. We were actively not trying. You would think we would have learned the first go around that it is not in our control and His plans are always much greater than our own. We went to the doctor for blood test confirmation and sure enough with super high HCG levels I was pregnant. We called and shocked both sets of grandparents and explained that we were probably more shocked than they were. The following week we went in for an ultrasound to see how far along we were and we saw a teeny tiny tad pole on the screen. Talk about love at first sight. The shock had worn off and we were immediately captivated by this precious bean growing inside of me.

How have I felt?
First Trimester:
Exhausted and sick. Seriously bed time sometimes is before 8pm and I've napped during C's nap time she's watched too much Mickey and Sofia the past few weeks. Bless my sweet husband he's been so patient. The house has stayed a disaster, I've ran away from the dinner table too many times to count, and again he's eaten his fair share of pasta and bland foods. Praise the Lord for ginger ale and gatorade and 7:30 bed times.

Second Trimester:

Glory my energy and appetite has finally returned (16 weeks) NO more puking.

Now that we're out of the first trimester we can breathe a little easier, so I thought. After our results came back slightly abnormal from our first trimester and higher than normal level for my age for a risk for downs syndrome we decided to do more testing. Not because we would have changed anything about this pregnancy, but we wanted to be prepared. I vividly remember having such a peace about it all and specifically praying to prepare our hearts for any adversity this sweet bean may face. That's the momma bear in me.

Fast forward the longest week and a half later and baby BOY's results can back in within the normal range for our age group. We had the option of finding out the gender with that blood test and I took it and was able to tell Derik that we were having a boy. That is a moment I will never, ever forget.

Our pregnancy progressed normally and at 18 weeks we had our anatomy scan. Two cysts were found on Parker's brain and although they are fairly common our doctor wanted us to do another ultrasound at the the hospital because of the cysts and the previous abnormal blood work. Again, longest two weeks ever until that ultrasound. I again had found such a peace until the appointment reminder call that also said we would be meeting with a genetic counselor. I'm sorry what? Aren't genetic counselors all doom and gloom? We considered cancelling our ultrasound because if anything was wrong it's not like we would do anything about it and let the Lord take control. The two cysts could have been indicators of a more severe chromosomal disorder in which Parker would either miscarry or be stillborn. Again, I had a peace and the devil put worry, doubt, and fear in my mind. From Thursday-Tuesday I walked around with a knot in my stomach feeling as if I could puke at any given time. In my heart I knew this baby boy was fine that nothing was wrong with him I knew it in my heart but the devil was tricking my mind. We arrived to our appointment and my BP was 149/77--nervous much-- I laid in that chair clutching on to Derik for dear life. The tech got her images and the doctor walked in and informed us that we had a completely HEALTHY perfect baby boy. Tears streamed down my face and I couldn't help but praise God right there in that ultrasound room. Talk about a perfect Christmas present as this all went down the week of Christmas.

I've learned so much throughout this pregnancy. My pregnancy with Caroline was pretty much textbook. Each week I would read in my What to Expect book and we were right on track on everything. This one has been completely different, he's thrown me for such a loop. But I'm so grateful for this sweet healthy baby boy growing in my belly.

Throughout this pregnancy the recurring theme has been God's faithfulness. I've doubted Him entirely way too much, questioned Him instead of trusted Him, and even gotten angry with Him. But yet He remained faithful. His grace allows me to doubt, question, and even be angry with Him. His grace and mercy have taught me so very much. His mercy never fails even though I fail Him every. single. day. I'm so grateful for His love!

I hope to instill this in Caroline and Parker. My prayer is that know God in such a real way that they'll learn to lean on Him more than us.

All of this to say we are so excited to welcome Parker Michael in May! He is so loved already, Caroline points to his sonogram and says baby. My heart swoons and I can't wait to see them together. They will never know life without each other and my prayer is that they will look at each other as their built in best friend.